Documentation & Video Editing: Este Sanchez

Why Can’t I Cry? is a durational video reflecting on the act of crying. During the video, a tear shaped bowl laced with blue pigment marks and traces the tears that run across Este’s face. Tears and the act of crying can be easy and difficult to access- the latter was Este’s experience in this sitting reflection. Their tension with accessing crying is a metaphor for the strained historical relationship of grieving for and with their mestizo and indigenous and femme and queer lineages. Grief that is pushed down to continue surviving under unjust conditions, grief that fights to be felt or expressed, grief that hides itself. It is a reflection on being and being with our tears.